Are you Aware?

I've thought a lot about what I want this blog to be. In the beginning it was just a useful tool for sharing our daily lives and activities with our family members that lived so far away. And a diary for my girls of their childhood. I read other blogs, some by friends and some not...and I can't help but think that sometimes, it wouldnt' hurt for my blog to have a purpose. For instance a friend of mine, blogs about her family (she has 4 kids), she blogs about recipes she is trying, and she blogs about political issues (she was a poly sci major in college). Teaching this semester has done wonders for me and I am SOOO enjoying talking about social problems and issues. Nevermind the fact that when I tried to talk about the terror attacks of 9/11, most of them couldn't relate because they were 8 years old. I digress, but maybe I can use this blog as a platform as well as a place to share our lives.

October for instance...yes, I love October. But did you know that October is a phenomenal month for awareness on women's issues? Of course we all know the PINK campaign. Susan G. Komen and the Breast Cancer Awareness campaign can be seen everywhere. Even NFL players wear pink athletic shoes to raise awareness about breast cancer. It's huge and totally important. We all know people, women, families affected by cancer. I personally don't have any family members that have been diagnosed with breast cancer, but three very important women in my life have battled the big C. Both of my grandmother's fought cancer and won their battles. Sadly my Aunt Karen was taken from us much too young and much too early.

October is also Pregnancy and Infant Loss awareness month. No one tells us as little girls, just how difficult the plight of motherhood can be. You think you fall in love, get married, have babies and live happily every after. That's just not the case for so many of us. Women struggle with infertility, they have partners that struggle with infertility....sometimes you can do everything by the book and still be left childless. And while again...I don't have personal experience in this realm, I have so many friends and family members that do, and the odds are you do too. So take the time to stop and say a prayer for all those mothers and the babies that they have lost, their grief is very real. And I know I will never take being a mother for granted.

Lastly, October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. This one hits home!!! I struggle with this one all the time. If you don't know...I was married once before Mitch, it was short-lived (Thank GOD!) and I'm one of the lucky ones. But once in awhile my past has a way of creeping into my life and reminds me that someday I will have to tell my girls about the fact that there was someone before their father. And how will I do that, how will I share that story? It will be a lesson. A lesson in life and how NOT to let others treat them or anyone else for that matter. It will be a lesson in self-esteem and self worth, so that they know they deserve to be treated with love and respect and nothing else will do.

It's so fitting that October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month...it's also the anniversary of my first marriage. A marriage to a "man" and I use the term very loosely, that found pleasure in causing pain both physical and emotional. He fed off of verbal assaults that left me feeling useless and they often times hurt more than the physical pain he inflicted. In fact I credit his words with being the fuel that lit my fire. He told me time and time again that I was stupid and would never get into the University of Illinois. I proved him wrong and applied to graduate school and in 2008 I graduated with my Masters in Social Work. I've worked in foster care, adoptions and in advocacy for the March of Dimes. I met with assembly members and senators and pushed the agenda of maternal and child health issues. Those are tough jobs for little old me. And while I don't wish what I went through with him on anyone, it made me who I am today. It made me strong. Strong enough that I was able to file for a divorce, get him out of my life, and walk away from the mess that he was trying to make of my life. And now I am grateful. Grateful for the courage and wisdom attained. Grateful that I had the opportunity to start over again, and grateful for where I am today and that is what I will tell my girls. Love shouldn't hurt and words shouldn't either.

So this October let's be aware: remember the victims, celebrate the survivor's and pray for all those that have shared in the journey. Cheers, October....you do my soul good.